Sunday, December 8, 2019

Backcountry Adventure, part 2.

The day started slowly. It was raining hard outside, we were "socked in" (the clouds and fog were thick), and we were sore from the day before. There wasn't much motivation to rush out the door.

The couple, Eric and Meg, were friendly and chipper, and we all four quickly fell back into fun and interesting conversation. When we finally decided to roll out, we agreed to hike together, as the weather was pretty terrible and a trek back along the ridge was out of the question, which meant we had only one reasonable route back. Eric and Meg made the polite disclaimer about "being slowpokes" and we could leave them behind if their pace was too slow for us. 

We had no idea the journey would be so challenging and precarious that we would stick together as a team the whole way back, and become fast friends in the process.


Fully geared up with rain coats, rain pants (for me at least), and trash bags for our backpacks (they had a spare), we set out into the storm. It was immediately brutal, and instantly soaked us. Cold, windy, and with pelting rain that drove from all directions.

We eventually descended into a valley, where we'd basically work our way down from the mountain tops, following the route carved by millions of years of water flow. Toward the top, the stream was quiet and small.

It was very, very wet, and my clothes were already mostly soaked through despite the rain gear. It turns out water repellent clothing wears out over time, and my jacket certainly did more than nothing but hardly was enough to actually keep me dry. Still, the view was gorgeous, and the people were fun.

Off in the distance, we could make a guess as to where we were heading. It was so wonderful to have a sense of how far we'd be traveling, and to see it in the distance. It's quite different from tromping through a forest, where you have no sense of the ground you can cover in a day, how to conceptualize 8 miles of ground to cover. What's visible in this photo was maybe half the distance of what we actually did.

The terrain was sketchy and required carefully picking our way across slopes of rock slides.

It wasn't long before we had to start crossing the river at regular intervals. This was the next phase of our journey, the water phase. The crossings were pretty manageable at first. As long as you kept moving and didn't try to balance on any particular rock, it was usually fine. 

I was often the one to go first, since it turns out I was the most nimble and daring when it came to hopping across rivers. Might be slightly related to being a dancer. Who knows. Anyway, usually I was there pep talking Eric and Meg, who were the least sure-footed. On a couple of occasions I'd provide a hand to steady them as they made their own way across. It was fun to feel like I was taking a bit of leadership and providing the power of positive momentum to keep us moving forward.

At one point toward the end, we ended up clambering across a fallen tree to pull off the crossing. All the while never falling in the river. (Certainly we could've walked through it, it wasn't particularly deep, but none of us were looking forward to sopping wet feet.)

There was one crossing in particular that stood out to my memory. There was a big rock on the other side, but far away. With most crossings you can get away with something like a hop step. This one though required a full, bodily leap across the stream. Before anyone could talk me into being afraid, I launched myself through the air and landed on all fours on the rock, scrabbling up and away from the water. I then turned around and talked other people up, and would catch them as they leapt across so they didn't have to worry about sticking the landing to avoid tumbling off into the water.

At last, toward the end of the water phase, we came upon a river crossing that was just too difficult. I took a stab at making it across, but the rock I was using slipped right underneath me and I stumbled backwards, topping my boots and nearly losing my balance entirely. The rest of the crew had to just bite the bullet and wade across. My boots and socks had already been pretty soaked from the rain, but now they were sopping and I could feel the squish, squish with every step.

We finally made it to Speargrass Hut, the halfway point, and settled in for lunch and to wring out our socks and clothes. After a couple unsuccessful attempts to build a fire by other people, I set myself to carefully nursing a fire to live in the wood stove while others prepared hot food to share. I take a certain amount of pride in being able to make a fire, and I'm glad I didn't have to eat my pride this time along with my lunch. It warmed the space and provided needed comfort to everyone.


After taking some time, we set back out. None of us were pleased about putting all our wet, soggy gear back on. Still, we kept in good cheer, and the conversation always was flowing. Meg and Eric had proven to be really sweet, lovely people, and delightful company. It was a pleasant surprise, because so often when you meet strangers there's a point where you genuinely want to be done with interacting, and we didn't ever tire of one another.

It was time to set back out into the forest. Looking back up the way we had come, it was satisfying to see the thick clouds through which we had hiked, now draping over the mountain like a blanket.

The forest path was usually obvious and marked, but still required careful navigation as the way forward was muddy and riddled with roots and large rocks to trip up feet.

At one point, we reached an area where the path had been completely washed out from the storm. Where there used to be a hill to cut along the circumference, there was now a huge gash, a valley of rocks and scree to crawl down and then scramble back up.

In another area, the land and route had been transformed by the storm. Normally the area we were standing would be flooded with waters, but presumably the wash out from above had changed the course of the river and diverted it in a new direction.

The final portion was challenging, hiking along a steep slope with only tree roots serving as our footholds.

The hike itself would not have been so challenging and intense were it not for the wet and cold. The consensus among Meg and Eric and Shantel, all more experienced backpackers, was that this was one of the most difficult routes they've ever tackled. It just made me appreciate the beauty and rigor of hiking through the backcountry, where you don't have a maintained path to ease your journey.

When we made it back to the parking lot, we were all cheers and joy. We had made it through a demanding trek together as a team, and weathering those tough moments together made us draw even closer together. I hope to get to connect with them back in Portland once they return and to maintain the friendship.


Saturday, December 7, 2019

Backcountry Adventure, part 1.

It began with a simple day hike at Nelson Lakes, and ended as one of the most intense, beautiful, and precarious backcountry adventures of my life. There's a saying, "If you do something and survive, it's courageous; if you die, it's stupidity." We were fortunate that it was courageous this time around.

The day hike began at 1pm, a wonderful and stunning jaunt around Mt. Roberts, overlooking Nelson Lakes. Shantel and I were in great spirits; the weather was overcast and cloudy, but the hike promised to be beautiful and fulfilling even without visibility.

The terrain changed several times; for much of it we were hiking up the side of the mountain in switchbacks, but eventually the trail cut inward off the hillside and into the forest. At that point, we had climbed into the clouds, creating a haunting effect in the woods.

Cresting onto the summit of Mt. Roberts, a cold, bone-chilling wind buffeted us in all directions. But we were treated to some truly stunning cloud movements as it rolled over the top.

On our way down, we made it to one of the "huts" as they're called in New Zealand. These huts are maintained by the Department of Conservation. They're typically a single room with loads of counter space and a dining table, plus bunk space with thick foam mats for sleeping. The huts are stocked with wood, and visitors are welcomed to build their own fires in the wood furnace to heat the space. 

We took refuge there, as at that moment a hailstorm bore down on us just as we were arriving at the door. We hung out with a family there, who had made plans to go further into the park, to a place called Angulus Hut, but they had heard a storm was rolling in and didn't want their small ones to brave the high winds along the ridge.

Eventually we continued on our way, completing a loop back down the mountain and to our parked van. The weather turned again, forming thunder in the distance, and then, finally, a most stunning daybreak. The sun streamed in and made the whole place feel like it had never rained in the first place.


By the time we made it back to the car, it was only 4:30pm. We had finished much earlier than expected, doing the route that was estimated to take 5 hours in just over 3. It was early, and we were in good spirits, and we weren't ready to be done hiking. 

Looking back at the map, we saw that Angulus Hut was estimated to take ~8-10 hours to get there. We figured we could do it ~6 hours, given our hiking tempo and how off the original estimate was. Worst case scenario, we thought, we'd be hiking with our headlamps at night along an obvious track like the one we had followed.

Boy were we wrong on that part.

We hustled to pack our backs with warm clothing just in case, dinner for the evening, and sleeping gear. We made a reservation at the hut, so we didn't bring our tent. (That was the first really big mistake.) We set off again in good spirits; our bodies a little sore, but excited for the adventure and ready to push ourselves.


There was another route we could've taken, Speargrass Trail, which would've given us a bailout hut option halfway there at Speargrass Hut in case we decided the trek was too much and we wanted to stop for the evening. We debated for a little while, and then favored the "Ridgeline Route" because it promised to be for "more experienced backpackers" as opposed to the other route which was intended for families. We wanted to push ourselves.

We cruised back up the mountain, making excellent time. After summiting Mt. Roberts in even faster time that previously, we pressed onward to our final destination, Angulus Hut, 9 km away. It was 7pm, and it said it was 4.5 hours away.

I will never forget the experience of watching the sun make its steady descent toward the horizon while at 4000' elevation. Nothing is in your way to obscure the majesty and beauty of this great star lighting up all the land beneath you.


We were hiking along the ridge of a mountain range. That stood to reason, as it was called Ridgeline Route, after all. It was cold and windy, but not to the extent that we were concerned about what might happen when the sun set. We knew it would get colder, but both of us had additional layers and we were maintaining a solidly warm core body temperature right now.

The path was still pretty obvious: a worn track through the gravel and small rocks, always marked at intervals with orange metal posts. The posts were often buried into piles of huge rocks, as there was no where else to stake them securely.


We saw lots of bizarre life up there, including this strange moss that I've never seen before.

We could pretty clearly see a final ridge that we were going to ascend over. We powered our way up the mountain. When we ascended the ridge, anticipating that the ridgeline part was over, we would just find... more ridge. Always, every time, just. more. ridge.

It was 8pm. The sun was still in the sky, but light was steadily fading, and we were beginning to wonder when we'd begin descending. The faint, growing fear was kept in check by a steady supply of breathtaking views, however.

We powered onward, not yet worried about our circumstances. The wind wasn't terrible, we still had ~1.5 hrs of light, we had warm gear, and the path was well marked. We kept the conversation going, sharing stories and laughter. We were deliberately staying positive.

Then the path became increasingly less obvious. We were scrambling over huge rocks, up and down and back up again. The hiking was intense, and we wanted to keep moving at a steady clip. It was a full body experience with using our arms for balance and moving us up and down the boulder fields.

A reality was finally sinking in: this was not merely hiking a path, we were in the backcountry. A vast expanse of nature, barely maintained except for these regular, impersonal, uninformative route markers. We were picking our way along the ridges of a mountain range, almost as ambiguously as if we had pointed in the distance and made a best guess as to how to get there. The route was growing in challenge, to the point where we're carefully climbing around huge rocky, craggy summits, with a steep slope below us. We weren't navigating cliffs per se, but if we fell we'd have a decidedly unpleasant way down. 


It was around this time that Shantel noted that she forgot to bring the first aid kit. (Our second mistake.) It's fine as long as no one gets hurts, but that's a big if, and we both totally deserve to be outdoorsy-shamed for such an obvious omission.

It's fine, I thought to myself. What could possibly go wrong? I was now literally crawling across a mixture of a frosty snow drift and thick, sharp rocks, all of which are loose and sliding out from underneath me. As I stepped through the terrain, I listened to the scree underfoot sliding out and tumbling a long way down. At one point I had to use my hands to grip uncertain, loose boulders to avoid sliding down myself.


It's fine. Turning around, I saw Shantel standing there, staring at what she had to do after me, breathless. I could tell she was working hard to quiet the panic in her mind, just like me. We just needed to keep our heads on straight and keep moving forward. There was no turning back, that would only make the situation more dangerous. Go big or maybe don't go home.

Around this time, I stopped taking photos. It was 9pm, the sun was setting, and we had maybe another half hour of light left. We didn't have a lot of time to dilly-dally, so we kept moving fast. I did, however, manage to snap a couple shots of a most spectacular sunset across the mountains while waiting for Shantel to catch up. 

It was majestic and humbling to be this deep into nature. Logically, I knew I wasn't terribly far away -- we had covered maybe 10 miles by that point, but I felt utterly alone, as if I had been trekking for days in the wilderness. There was not a single trace of humanity, save for the route markers. While the feeling was a little terrifying, it was also exhilarating. I was beginning to understand why people undertake such epic journeys into nature.


"Hey," I said to Shantel, "Just wanted to note that this spot is pretty sheltered. Not that it would come to it." 

My lizard brain was trying its damndest to make me freak out, but I wouldn't let it. Peering into the fading light, I made reasonable guesses as to where we were heading and noting its compass bearing. We had water and food. I kept track of slightly flatter, more sheltered areas where we could take refuge if needed (again, having a tent would've been clutch in case of emergency). We both had excellent sleeping bags and could most likely withstand an uncomfortable, fearful night on mountain. The storm was nowhere in sight, so we were lucky in that regard.

Panicking wasn't go to serve us, so there was no room for it. Just keep moving, just keep those legs working, and keep careful track of where steps are landing.

My chief concern was losing track of the route markers once darkness descended. Sometimes they were hard to spot even before the sun set, and now I was thinking about how we'd pull it off I couldn't see beyond the beam of a headlamp. The path was occasionally worn well enough that we could make it that way, but there were too many places where there was no guessing which direction to go next for me to rely upon it.

I was working out contingencies in my head when we spotted a sign. A sign! Information! It was encouraging to even know the sign existed before reading it. Shantel wondered aloud, "This sign will either make me really happy to have a good cry. I wonder which kind of sign it is!"

" < -- Angulus Hut     30 min   1 km"

We were nearly there. We both laughed exuberantly and hugged one another. We got this.

I took out my headlamp because the light was about to completely fade from the sky, and replenished its batteries with some spares I had brought. (That was the 1st really great decision I had made, bringing those spares. Always bring spare batteries. Always.) With a fresh, bright beam of light, we had no problem finding each post, and the route was finally descending, rather than continuing along more ridges.

When we saw the hut, nestled next to a stunningly beautiful lake nestled among the mountains, we were filled with such elation and joy. We were going to be just fine. 

Once we made it to the hut and dumped our stuff, we met the only other two people in the hut that night. They were both, amusingly, from Portland. Small world. They had just gotten engaged by the lake maybe a couple hours earlier. They were friendly, convivial, and great with conversation. We quickly became acquainted, swapped stories and laughter.

We walked 13 miles that day. Looking through the photos later, we realized we had a pretty good shot of at least some of the distance covered.

When we ate, it was a deep, ravenous hunger, and the food felt so very deserved. Our sleeping bags were warm, which was fortunate because wood hadn't been delivered in a couple weeks and the hut was quite cold. The hut warden (DoC volunteers who staff the huts for week-long stints to provide weather updates and emergency services to backpackers) griped about the lack of firewood. She was probably 60 years old and a total badass.

I was so glad to make it through. It was the kind of danger where, in the present moment, it's totally fine, but it felt precarious, like that fortune could change very suddenly. We made some critical errors that made the situation much more precarious. Lessons learned:

  1. Bring shelter
  2. Bring a first aid kit
  3. Check the weather beforehand
  4. Check the route conditions (talk to the park rangers) and know what you're getting into

We made it through safe and sound and learned some important lessons. It was the most intense backpacking day of my life, and my first day in the backcountry. It's an experience that will stay with me for the rest of my life. 

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

"Give me your money."

TW armed robbery

About two hours ago (11:50pm) I was mugged at gunpoint in Philadelphia. I am safe and unharmed. Only $40 was stolen, I was only threatened and not attacked, and I'm fortunate it was nothing more -- both my phone and credit cards were not taken.

The guy was clumsy. He did a poor job getting my attention, approaching me from behind. I had been on the phone, and at some point he took the phone from me and turned it off, holding it in his hand. There was something strangely human in it, watching him do this thing we all do (ending a phone call).

Once he did and told me to give him my wallet, at first I was incredulous: "For real, you're robbing me?" At which point he waved his gun and said he wasn't fucking around. I was struck by how calm I remained through it, and how agitated he was. He kept demanding my wallet, which I calmly demonstrated was an object not on my person (I only carry an ID, credit card, and small amount of cash). I could see through his eyes the situation, how he was taking this huge risk of armed robbery and coming up disappointingly short, and it was bordering on comical to me. When he disengaged, he unconvincingly told me to run. I didn't, but walked away briefly before turning around to try to follow him as he fled the scene.

I was genuinely surprised he gave me my phone and cards back. He probably didn't want to risk getting tracked. In a strange way, I appreciated that. He wasn't trying to ruin my life, just nick some quick cash off a target. It felt almost like a business transaction, except clumsy and vaguely threatening. I feel hugely grateful I didn't have to add the fear of sexual assault on top of the experience. I am really, really lucky.

The whole experience felt more like a nuisance, a disappointing experience of Philadelphia, rather than a deeply traumatic experience. I almost didn't call the cops because so little damage was actually done, but then decided to in case he could be stopped from committing further crimes. The police were on the scene within minutes, picked me up and then scoured the area. It was impressive how quick their response time was, and it was a whole fleet of cars working in unison combined (briefly) with a helicopter search. For all the shit we give police forces about everything they do wrong (and there are plenty legitimate grievances to be sure), they certainly had their act together in responding here. Perhaps that partially had to do with white male privilege, but in this case I'll take it.

I was pleased with how I handled the situation, but it wasn't flawless. I'd give myself an 80% at best. I remained calm and under control, calculating my risk of fighting back versus complying. But, I was walking distracted late at night, and I know better there, and didn't assertively defend certain items (like allowing him to take the phone out of my hand). I don't like that he could've walked off with information that could've led to identity theft. I could tell the guy was all bluster, I could've defended myself better.

During the line of information gathering from one of the police officers, he asked me where I was walking from. I had been on a 45 minute walk, enjoying the night air, to get home. I informed him I was coming from downtown, about 30 minutes away, to which he exclaimed, "You WALKED?!" Call me a naïve Pacific Northwest hippy, apparently it's unheard of to enjoy a nighttime walk through sketchy parts of Philadelphia. It's moments like these that make me realize I'm a full-blown Polyanna when it comes to concerns about "sketchy neighborhoods" or fear of crime. We'll see how this event impacts that spirit, up to now I've generally believed that life is too short to be afraid of it and I'll just deal with the consequences when they come to me. I hope this event doesn't make me fearful of walking at night, I quite enjoy having that freedom and liberty.

I'm feeling lucky to be alive and mostly unaffected by a situation that could've turned devastating very quickly.

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

Welcome to the big leagues.

Favorite moment of the day: sitting in a conference room with a former CEO of Teach For America, talking about how to make life easier for Montessori teachers. Other attendees included a former SVP of Strategy for Teach For America, a tech entrepreneur previously listed on the "Top 40 Under 40," an engineer who built up a platform to remotely monitor the insulin levels of his diabetic daughter in his spare time, and Jeremy who originally built Transparent Classroom on nights and weekends to support the launch of a Montessori school.

There's nothing but all-stars in this room: welcome to the big leagues. It feels like I'm standing among giants, I'm scared witless thinking I'm so outclassed and under-qualified, and yet they still fully engage with my input. It's a positively thrilling experience.

Monday, November 14, 2016

Starting a new chapter: Transparent Classroom.

Today marks the beginning of new journey in life: I have left a rewarding and stable job with my previous employer, Amazon Web Services, to go pursue a rare and exciting opportunity working with Jeremy Lightsmith as Engineer #2 on his startup, Transparent Classroom.


Transparent Classroom is a classroom management software platform for Montessori teachers and admins. It has grown 3.5x annually for the past two years, with over 270 schools now signed up, and is commonly referred to as the most user-friendly and useful platform in the Montessori edtech space. Jeremy accomplished all this over four years as the sole engineer while also wearing all the other hats necessary to get a startup off the ground: CEO, CTO, CFO, admin, customer support rep, trainer, sysadmin, sales rep, and designer (to name a few). Oh, and he's also a husband, parent, Agile coach, and facilitator. Naturally, I jumped at the opportunity to work with someone so passionate to improve education and so capable to actually make a difference with a product that delights users.

I'm thrilled to work with a small and scrappy team, all of us dedicated to improving education and the lives of teachers and children. I can now apply my skills in software engineering to make the world a better place, which was what drew me to programming in the first place.

I would like to thank Jeremy for the opportunity to join the team, to my family for their support and understanding as I give up a perfectly good job at one of the biggest names in software to go pursue my passion, to my friends and community that supported me as I deliberated over the decision and offered such valuable advice. I am so fortunate to be able to take this risk, and part of being able to conquer my fears of the unknown comes from the support and growth through being part of this amazing community.