Thursday, August 4, 2011

Meal fail.

Breakfast: two eggs on toast. oatmeal.

Snack: small cup of yogurt drink (v. sugary)

Lunch: two bites of rice deep-fried in palm oil, and... oatmeal.

Snack: yogurt drink, two slices of bread with thin peanut butter spread (I'm out now)

Dinner: deep-fried sweet potato chips, and... oatmeal.

What I see in this daily intake: starch, starch, starch, protein, sugar oil, oil, sugar, starch, oil, starchoil, oil, sugar, protein, oil, oil, starch.

Fuck. Sometimes I'm surprised by how closely my diet is tied to my mood, because this makes me depressed. My only reliable sources of protein are a yogurt drink that's loaded with sugar, peanut butter that's loaded with sugar, and oatmeal. I can't do insanity on this kind of diet. I skipped today as well... Major fail. I can't give up... Even though oatmeal is more balanced, it's hard to eat three times per day and not feel insecure about food and sad about the present state of things. (And remember, we're talking instant oatmeal with cinnamon and a little sugar -- no delicious fruits or creative additions.)

... bleh. What a shitty food day. What a shitty mood day because of the food day. Yesterday was a mental fart day. Today I just felt physically enervated. I could've loaded up on calories if I actually ate the lunch they served, but... I really didn't want more oil. I'm so goddam sick of the oil. Oil oil oil.

Bad day.

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